Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I have post one night stand depression
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
