Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
