ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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