He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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