You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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