If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize