i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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