Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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