Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Randomize
