ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
