woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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