we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Alive.
So much puke
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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