i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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