We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
