highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
