Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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