My Higher Power is John Stamos
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He did a backflip because drugs
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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