I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Randomize
