Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Randomize
