We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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