If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
