So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
you traded sex for a burrito?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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