so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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