your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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