I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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