i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize