how do flat chested girls get laid?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
NoShamevember. You game?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize