HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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