He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
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