White coat. Heels.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
