so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize
