matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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