actually, I'm a sock model
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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