whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
im six kinds of drunk right now
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Acid is not a monday night drug
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
