i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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