Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
