For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
