Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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