There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
