Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
