shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
