their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize