Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize