Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
