Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
