I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
