when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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