You're completely useless in the revolution.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
