O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
