i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
