i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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