I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
